Once again I am making an effort at webjournaling. Usually this sort of thing doesn't work for me for very long but... hey. Why not? I have a feeling that if I had a digital camera there would be a lot more posting of intiresting things on here but, you know how it goes. Tonight I am buzzed on caffine from Excedrin and thinking about how I have to be at work pretty early tomorrow. My room is a freaking mess that is driving me INSANE but I haven't had the time/modivation to clean it yet. Also, I have been having internal resistance to anything and anyone I feel is trying to 'control me for my own good'. Even if I know they are right, I have been feeling rebellous. I have been taking steps to make my life better lately; working out, doing homework, doing the right thing even though it's the hard thing; but I still have this feeling of impending doom that tells me that I am neglecting important things and the shit will inevetably hit the fan. Oh well, this is not an uncommon experience in my life. Either everything is wrong or I am waiting for everything to go wrong while really enjoying stuff being right. I would REALLY like to go to Asia next year as well, I really hope that happens but I am just going to wait and see. Whatever my life holds for me- I am open minded and ready for that. A wise man told me reciently: "If you fear the future, fearful things will happen to you." among other wise things. I completely agree and am trying very hard not to fear the future. No apprehension, no fear, just willingness to have a hellova lot of fun. Anyway, enough for now. If I decide to give people this website address and you decide to start reading it- beware, I have a habit of telling people pretty much everything about myself.
Love you all!
Jessie
